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Should he do it? |
Yes |
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77% |
[ 7 ] |
No |
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0% |
[ 0 ] |
Don't know |
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22% |
[ 2 ] |
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Total Votes : 9 |
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Nameless Site Owner
Joined: 06 Sep 2002 Posts: 1368 Location: Vienna, Austria
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Posted: Mon Sep 27, 2004 11:26 am Post subject: Short Story: An Important Question |
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The short story "An Important Question" has been posted.
Does anyone have an answer? _________________ I'm a nut, but there are those who appreciate me for it. |
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Shirh Khan Site Owner
Joined: 04 Jul 2001 Posts: 332 Location: In transition/between states
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Posted: Mon Sep 27, 2004 10:33 pm Post subject: Drumroll please!.... |
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I say "no."
In my opinion, it' too soon; I think he needs more time to heal; once he's ready, he'd be more likely to know, without having to consider it so heavily. But, then again, I'm a proper "nut" for angst myself, as you well know, so maybe you should rethink my answer.
But there it is. Have at it. *grin*
-Shirh Khan _________________ "Life is not for the faint of heart. Live a little!!"
-said Shirh to his brother, Elijah |
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Hortmage Registered User
Joined: 28 Oct 2001 Posts: 243 Location: Midwest
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Posted: Mon Sep 27, 2004 10:56 pm Post subject: |
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Wow! A very moving, emotional story, Nameless!
I also found the literary style quite interesting. It worked well for this story.
Regarding the question in question: He definitely needs more time...to grieve, to begin the recovery process. I don't know why, but I can envision with the type of society these animal-people have, that it would be expected (or at least, not too surprising) for a younger sister to become the new wife and mom...didn't some of the pioneer families do that?
I think eventually he will come around and marry Tonya, but he'll never love her like he did Ana. Perhaps a proposal, with a long engagement to get used to the idea? Sort of "I'm not ready now, but you have my promise that we'll marry when I am ready".
Well done! _________________ Hortmage, the Magic Gardener
Making environmental education fun and MAGICAL! |
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vladspellbinder Registered User
Joined: 16 Nov 2003 Posts: 58 Location: In the gutter..ohh my location not my minds...
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Posted: Mon Sep 27, 2004 11:19 pm Post subject: |
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You have them putting their clothes on twice
“We made love, then we put our clothes back on and fell asleep.”
“We spent another hour or so in the hay, then we put our clothes back on and left.”
Near the start, 10th and 12th paragraphs ::is counting the starting sentences as paragraphs:: Other that little redundancy it’s a wonderful story. Unless of course your alluding to the fact they undressed, made love, then dressed again but I didn’t think of that until right before posting <_< >_>…
Nicely written, though I would like to know the questions the Father asked of him. You can guess from the response but it would still be nice to know the exact wording and phrasing of the questions.
Yes I think he’ll wind up with the sister as his wife, but it will take some time for him to get over his former wife. The heart needs time to heal as much as it can before loving another…Ick, I need to wash all this sap off… _________________ Crazy Black Panther, obscur and strange as always
Don't mind the horns, they are only there to hold up the halo
Fiendly bloodsucker signing off for now 0>:)
P: retteb elttil a emit ruoy dneps |
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Bearion Registered User
Joined: 01 Jun 2002 Posts: 278 Location: Bay Area, California
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Posted: Tue Sep 28, 2004 12:27 am Post subject: |
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I agree with the choir: He needs time to heal.
The kits need to bond more with Tom and he should not consider Tanya until he has finally laid Anastasia to rest in his mind and heart. Then he can focus his feelings. Anything else wouldn't be fair to Tanya.
Great story, as always, Nameless. _________________ I'm out of my mind right now, but feel free to leave a message... |
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Nameless Site Owner
Joined: 06 Sep 2002 Posts: 1368 Location: Vienna, Austria
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Posted: Tue Sep 28, 2004 12:30 am Post subject: |
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vladspellbinder wrote: | You have them putting their clothes on twice
“We made love, then we put our clothes back on and fell asleep.”
“We spent another hour or so in the hay, then we put our clothes back on and left.” |
Actually, that was intentional.
The implied message is that they took off their clothes after waking up and that they made love again ("...another hour..."). _________________ I'm a nut, but there are those who appreciate me for it. |
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Furry_wolf2001b Registered User
Joined: 01 Nov 2003 Posts: 54
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Posted: Tue Sep 28, 2004 1:30 am Post subject: |
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I say: yes!
There is no hurry tho.
An engament sounds like a good compromise.
And talking about loving tanya...
Well he said he dident truly love ana at first...
I think tanya wuld help heal his wounds, and i think part of the thing that makes him hesitate is the fear of it happening again...
Dose he dare to love again, dose he dare to get so close to another person again and risk being hurt again so teribly...
Not consiusly tho i dont think.
Plus the thing is he is cofortably with the situation makes him also more scared of rocking the boat so to say...
But it is unfair to them both, and the kidds to drag things out fore too long too. _________________ My spelling sux.
But i dont. |
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Paladin Registered User
Joined: 01 Jun 2004 Posts: 47 Location: Pittsburgh, Pensyltucky
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Posted: Tue Sep 28, 2004 8:17 am Post subject: |
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I must agree with Furry_wolf. The situation Tom is in, is not unique. Of course he must grieve, but there is no proper time limit on grieving. It is clear and obvious that Tom will always love Ana.
Tom would have to do the best thing for his kits. The best thing for children at that O' so tender age, would be to give them a stable mother. Tanya fits the bill perfectly. The kits already view her as a 'mum'. A marrige between them is almost a definate thing, but I would wager that no hurry on the time of said marrige is neccessary.
A long 'courting' would help both Tom and Tonya heal. Tom lost his wife, but let us not forget Tanya lost her sister. The kits would bring them together. It would not be the 'love at first sight' that the animal people talk about. I truely believe that, given time, a powerfull love between Tom and Tanya would. It most likely has begun already. To deny the heart may even cause more pain to both of them, and the kits as well.
Ah well, just the rambolings of a Paladin. Most excellant as always Nameless. As soon as I started reading, I could not stop. Keep up the most excellant work! _________________ Even during our darkest times,
THE LIGHT SHINES!
We got a long way to go,
and a short timt to get there... |
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Cooldrew100 Registered User
Joined: 27 Mar 2004 Posts: 131 Location: Wherever I happen to be!
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Posted: Thu Oct 07, 2004 6:27 pm Post subject: |
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I agree with most everyone here, he should but only after a while.
By the way, what were those brackets in between the paragraphs? I realize he's talking to someone, but who? _________________ Greatest flash-animation site in existance.
My furry code of DOOM! FIHp3arw A-- C->+ D- H++ M- P->+ R- T++ W Z? !S RLCT/U a- cn++ d++>++++ e- f--> h* i+ j->+ p+ sm-
Thanks to Scifer for the avatar! |
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vladspellbinder Registered User
Joined: 16 Nov 2003 Posts: 58 Location: In the gutter..ohh my location not my minds...
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Posted: Thu Oct 07, 2004 10:59 pm Post subject: |
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Cooldrew100 wrote: | I realize he's talking to someone, but who? |
The 'Father' he address at the very start of the story.
I would like to know the exact wording of the Father's questions/responses myself...don't know about any of you... _________________ Crazy Black Panther, obscur and strange as always
Don't mind the horns, they are only there to hold up the halo
Fiendly bloodsucker signing off for now 0>:)
P: retteb elttil a emit ruoy dneps |
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Henry_Hound Registered User
Joined: 15 Apr 2004 Posts: 792 Location: Somewhereville, MO
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Posted: Fri Oct 08, 2004 12:21 am Post subject: |
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I believe he should ask her to marry him but explain that he can't marry her until he is ready to. It is definately the best thing he can do in that situation. And if not so much for himself for the kits. The need a mother that will be there when they need one. _________________ I'm a serial killer, it's a bad habbit.
I killed tony, lucky charms, and the silly rabbit. |
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Nameless Site Owner
Joined: 06 Sep 2002 Posts: 1368 Location: Vienna, Austria
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Posted: Fri Oct 08, 2004 12:34 am Post subject: |
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Cooldrew100 wrote: | By the way, what were those brackets in between the paragraphs? I realize he's talking to someone, but who? |
Yes, this is the space where the other person talks / asks questions.
No, I don't intend to write what the other person asks. I also avoid short answers ("Yes."), so that the reader can figure out what was asked. It's the style I have chosen for this story.
From the things he says "Father" and "You performed the services" it should be clear that he is talkin to a priest. _________________ I'm a nut, but there are those who appreciate me for it. |
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