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Crimson Abyss - A Sci-Fur Fantasy
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Scifer
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PostPosted: Mon May 31, 2004 2:44 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Mike Regan wrote:
When you have them under contro then work on the next problem.


Mike Regan wrote:
contro
!!!


Aha! Gotcha! Twisted Evil

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At first, nothing happened; then it disintegrated an owl.
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Elfen_Furry
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PostPosted: Mon May 31, 2004 5:54 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Scifer wrote:
Mike Regan wrote:
When you have them under contro then work on the next problem.


Mike Regan wrote:
contro
!!!


Aha! Gotcha! Twisted Evil


Actually, 'contro' is spanish/latin for 'WITH' Twisted Evil

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Shadu
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PostPosted: Wed Jun 02, 2004 2:20 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Elfen_Furry wrote:
Scifer wrote:
Mike Regan wrote:
When you have them under contro then work on the next problem.


Mike Regan wrote:
contro
!!!


Aha! Gotcha! Twisted Evil


Actually, 'contro' is spanish/latin for 'WITH' Twisted Evil


Maby latin though in spanish its only 'con' that means 'with'.

I offer my services as latin american for those of you who want to check any spanish reference. I might not have a foolproof spanish grammer but its good enough for high grades evey now and then.

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Elfen_Furry
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PostPosted: Wed Jun 02, 2004 2:51 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Shadu wrote:
Elfen_Furry wrote:
Scifer wrote:
Mike Regan wrote:
When you have them under contro then work on the next problem.


Mike Regan wrote:
contro
!!!


Aha! Gotcha! Twisted Evil


Actually, 'contro' is spanish/latin for 'WITH' Twisted Evil


Maby latin though in spanish its only 'con' that means 'with'.

I offer my services as latin american for those of you who want to check any spanish reference. I might not have a foolproof spanish grammer but its good enough for high grades evey now and then.


With 87 different dialects of Spanish, how are we going to agree on any of all this?
con/contra/contro means 'with'. It just depends on what tongue you use and how you use it.

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Shadu
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PostPosted: Wed Jun 02, 2004 9:41 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

WAY TOO TRUE!!!! Mr. Green thoug i have to remind you that you forgot the almost 10 to 20 times that much in dialects and variations only here in colombia i know of 4 or 5 different ways of speaking spanish.
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Elfen_Furry
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PostPosted: Wed Jun 02, 2004 10:10 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

LMAO!!!
And I thought I had it bad knowing Puerto Rican, Cuban, Mexican, Gatamalian, Equadorian and Castellian dilects!

*thumbs up to a fellow Latino/hispanic*

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RealDesertFox
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PostPosted: Wed Jun 02, 2004 10:29 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Scifer wrote:
Also guys, I'm only 17 and I only got two Bs in English at O level. Have mercy on me with the gramma crap. Crying or Very sad


And here's me with my C in English Language and D in English Lit. x.X Me no good grammer...
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Scifer
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PostPosted: Sun Jun 06, 2004 10:39 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Why must one have to use correct grammar anyway? I'm trying to explore different ways of saying things, and one way of doing that is 'to put it another way'. Besides, you're not going to get remembered as a writer if you didn't do something different ... or bend the rules to your liking. Twisted Evil

As for the difficulties with the plot, I'm thinking about making the journey the colonizers take a little longer by making them stop off at various bases for food and extra fuel. I've sorted out a way of writing so that I don't use the word 'the vixen' three times in one sentance (Now that I go back and read it again, yes, that was pretty annoying. 2 points to whoever spotted that), and I've started work on chapter 3. I've yet to post 2 as there's still quiet a lot wrong with it.

Later, I'm planning to post one of my story guideines that I make for every book that I (try and) write.

I actually appreciate this guys, no matter how much it looks like I'm trying to be spiteful. Wink

- Sci-fur

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Elfen_Furry
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PostPosted: Sun Jun 06, 2004 10:41 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Scifer wrote:
Why must one have to use correct grammar anyway? I'm trying to explore different ways of saying things, and one way of doing that is 'to put it another way'. Besides, you're not going to get remembered as a writer if you didn't do something different ... or bend the rules to your liking. Twisted Evil


Bending Grammar is called Poetry. Whether it if fits a pattern or not is irrelevent. Second, you can not establish a new language standard unless you have established yourself as an accomplished writer. Dont try to cut corners, unless you want to find out that your fingers are in the bloody way.


Scifer wrote:
As for the difficulties with the plot, I'm thinking about making the journey the colonizers take a little longer by making them stop off at various bases for food and extra fuel. I've sorted out a way of writing so that I don't use the word 'the vixen' three times in one sentance (Now that I go back and read it again, yes, that was pretty annoying. 2 points to whoever spotted that), and I've started work on chapter 3. I've yet to post 2 as there's still quiet a lot wrong with it.


Dont change the story in mid-writing. Keep to your plots and character developments. You can twist your subplots around to make a character more important than another of give them a dark secret that the others should not know. But changing the story around- bad idea.

Scifer wrote:
Later, I'm planning to post one of my story guideines that I make for every book that I (try and) write.

I actually appreciate this guys, no matter how much it looks like I'm trying to be spiteful. Wink

- Sci-fur


Good luck...
But.. dont post anything that would give your readers a head start on your story. Along with readerships- there is also a copyright issue, where someone can take your guideline and use it for their own works, publish it and get famous from it, while you are still on PF posting this one.

If anything, post chapter titles (if you use them) as hints to the up coming chapters... Most of my readers hate the ones I use, titles only give enough of a taste, its worse than the taste tease that Japanese Miso soup has... Twisted Evil

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Scifer
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Joined: 01 Mar 2004
Posts: 1518
Location: Boringville, UK

PostPosted: Mon Jun 07, 2004 3:31 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Elfen_Furry wrote:
Bending Grammar is called Poetry. Whether it if fits a pattern or not is irrelevent. Second, you can not establish a new language standard unless you have established yourself as an accomplished writer. Dont try to cut corners, unless you want to find out that your fingers are in the bloody way.


There you go again. You need to give me an example ... if you can find one, instead of just wrecklessly stamping on my dreams like ... these kittens ... Mad Evil or Very Mad Mad

Elfen_Furry wrote:
Dont change the story in mid-writing. Keep to your plots and character developments. You can twist your subplots around to make a character more important than another of give them a dark secret that the others should not know. But changing the story around- bad idea.


Hmm ... It's my story, and I can change it to how I want, seeing as I've already got a skeletal structure which is the guideline for my story, so I can bend it and change it around to how I want. My story plot is as flexible as my language. Wink

Elfen_Furry wrote:
Good luck...
But.. dont post anything that would give your readers a head start on your story. Along with readerships- there is also a copyright issue, where someone can take your guideline and use it for their own works, publish it and get famous from it, while you are still on PF posting this one.

If anything, post chapter titles (if you use them) as hints to the up coming chapters... Most of my readers hate the ones I use, titles only give enough of a taste, its worse than the taste tease that Japanese Miso soup has... Twisted Evil


I see. Confused And yes, I do know about copyright stuff.

...

I'm starting to get a bit ticked off with you, Mr. Furry. Evil or Very Mad

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Scifer
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PostPosted: Tue Jun 08, 2004 6:07 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Galadrion wrote:
Question: assuming a constant-boost vessel,


A little too much 'assuming' is going on here. And you cannot spell assuming without ass. Laughing Assume the titans aren't flying on a constant boost. Assume they need to steer out of the solar system on only one burst of gas to conserve fuel supplies.

Anyway, boring grammar aside, is there anything I can do to improve the way I describe things? A lot of human people over here in England who have read the story say that I have a very dynamic way of writing and describing. They say I have 'pace'. When my story needs to go super-speed, it goes uber-speed!! Twisted Evil An example of this would probably be where I kill off all of the human characters in less than a minute.

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Cateagle
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PostPosted: Wed Jun 09, 2004 12:16 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Scifer wrote:
Galadrion wrote:
Question: assuming a constant-boost vessel,


A little too much 'assuming' is going on here. And you cannot spell assuming without ass. Laughing Assume the titans aren't flying on a constant boost. Assume they need to steer out of the solar system on only one burst of gas to conserve fuel supplies.

Anyway, boring grammar aside, is there anything I can do to improve the way I describe things? A lot of human people over here in England who have read the story say that I have a very dynamic way of writing and describing. They say I have 'pace'. When my story needs to go super-speed, it goes uber-speed!! Twisted Evil An example of this would probably be where I kill off all of the human characters in less than a minute.


One "burst"? Unless you've got inertial damping or something similar, there are limits to what thrust you can maintain for how long - mostly biological limits - holding a constant boost of even .5g for the necessary period probably uses the fuel to better advantage that a single intense burst. Now, after you've acheived the velocity you want, you can shut down and coast, taking your time, but that then requires either some form of artificial gravity (whether a rotating ship using centrifugal force or a way of generating gravity) or passengers and crew adapted to free fall.

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Scifer
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PostPosted: Wed Jun 09, 2004 11:25 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'm thinking of designing the ships with 3 rotating halos around the fuselage for the living quarters etc.
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Elfen_Furry
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PostPosted: Wed Jun 09, 2004 2:10 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Scifer wrote:
Elfen_Furry wrote:
Bending Grammar is called Poetry. Whether it if fits a pattern or not is irrelevent. Second, you can not establish a new language standard unless you have established yourself as an accomplished writer. Dont try to cut corners, unless you want to find out that your fingers are in the bloody way.


There you go again. You need to give me an example ... if you can find one, instead of just wrecklessly stamping on my dreams like ... these kittens ... Mad Evil or Very Mad Mad

Elfen_Furry wrote:
Dont change the story in mid-writing. Keep to your plots and character developments. You can twist your subplots around to make a character more important than another of give them a dark secret that the others should not know. But changing the story around- bad idea.


Hmm ... It's my story, and I can change it to how I want, seeing as I've already got a skeletal structure which is the guideline for my story, so I can bend it and change it around to how I want. My story plot is as flexible as my language. Wink

Elfen_Furry wrote:
Good luck...
But.. dont post anything that would give your readers a head start on your story. Along with readerships- there is also a copyright issue, where someone can take your guideline and use it for their own works, publish it and get famous from it, while you are still on PF posting this one.

If anything, post chapter titles (if you use them) as hints to the up coming chapters... Most of my readers hate the ones I use, titles only give enough of a taste, its worse than the taste tease that Japanese Miso soup has... Twisted Evil


I see. Confused And yes, I do know about copyright stuff.

...

I'm starting to get a bit ticked off with you, Mr. Furry. Evil or Very Mad


An Example?
Do not go gentle ino that good night
By Dylan Thomas

Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do no go gentle ino that good night.

Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
Their frail deeds might have danced in a gren bay,
Rage rage against the dying of the light.

Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
And learn, too late, theygrieved it on its way,
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

And you, my father, there on the sad height,
Curse, bless, me now with your fierce tears, I pray
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Scifer; I'm not shooting you down. Understand that.

Though there are many ways one could write,
One must plan in order to find one's sight.
Scream, rant, anr rave all you want,
Make no excuses for not enough.

A story must come from here (Points to the heart)
If the message you send is to be understood by the lot.
Experience is not the best of teachers,
With dynamite sticks, one chance will beat you.

One must not wrestle with the words of the plot.
A story goes from end to start
Its how the author know when his work is done.
And only his reader knows who of good and evil has won...

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Elfen_Furry
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PostPosted: Wed Jun 09, 2004 2:38 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Scifer:

Twisting the english language around is simple.
Making your audience understand what you are saying is the hard part.

English as some flexablility to barrow and make up words as needed.
But again, you have to make your audience understand what you are saying.

Want an example?
Quote:
In Xanadu did Kubla Khan, A stately pleasure-dome decree. Where Alph, the sacred river, ran. Through caverns measureless to man. Down to a sunless sea...


If it was not for the verbal clues set aside by Coolridge so long ago in this piece of "art", one would not know who or what is Xanadu, Kubla Khan, or Alph is.

Nouns are easy to create as needed. Verbs are a little harder, but still doable. Again, unless you have been accepted as a master of the language and as an artist of its form, you can not create new standards.

The exceptions to this would be- the nouns (easy) and the verbs (a bit harder to do); for if in sci fi you need an item the only exists in your universe of your story, then create it. But then you would have to explain it.

Rodenbury did an excellent example of this- naming the souls of the alien races (and in some the alien races themselves). For the Vulcans, its call a Ka'tra- as stated in Star Trak 3- In Search of Spock.

Any Questions?

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