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Hortmage Registered User
Joined: 28 Oct 2001 Posts: 243 Location: Midwest
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Posted: Tue Mar 16, 2004 9:21 pm Post subject: |
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I don't know whether to make a comment about the story here, or dare starting my own thread...
So I'll comment here.
Chapter 18 was an interesting revision of how Merry and Pippin were treated by the orcs...and very believable, with a female as a captive.
But I'm curious about what you're hinting at with Hermione in 18. Sudden bouts of nausea? Inability to do magic? Did someone forget to practice safe whoopy with Harry?
Assuming Hermione is preggers...where did you get the idea that pregnancy caused a reduction/elimination of one's magical abilities? I know for a fact it was never discussed in Tolkein's work...and I don't believe Rowling alluded to anything in her books. Is this creative license on your part, Kinsfire, or am I waaaaaaay off base in thinking Hermione is in a family way?
Another point I wanted to make....I really like the story in general, and I greatly enjoy when you start ad-libbing with the dialog and actions...such as Harry and Ron trying to get off the mountain in Chapter 19. But some of the language appears to be lifted straight out of Tolkein (for example, when Gimli is praising the elf-queen's beauty). Again, I may be wrong about it being a direct cut and paste....but it's similar enough to Tolkein's language that it detracts from YOUR story. I realize that there are going to be passages that you need to use, to keep the story going in the right direction...but IMHO, you should try to paraphrase a bit more, to make it sound more like YOU.
Keep up the good work! _________________ Hortmage, the Magic Gardener
Making environmental education fun and MAGICAL! |
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Galadrion Registered User
Joined: 17 Aug 2001 Posts: 378 Location: Portland, Oregon
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Posted: Wed Mar 17, 2004 12:26 am Post subject: |
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Hortmage wrote: | But I'm curious about what you're hinting at with Hermione in 18. Sudden bouts of nausea? Inability to do magic? Did someone forget to practice safe whoopy with Harry?
Assuming Hermione is preggers...where did you get the idea that pregnancy caused a reduction/elimination of one's magical abilities? |
<Grin> I knew I wouldn't be the only one who picked up that idea!
As to where that idea comes from... True, it's not mentioned in Tolkein's work or Rowling's, but there are several literary traditions that hold that view - either as fact-in-the-story, or as a common belief among the people therein. I'd say it's fair game, personally.
It's certainly a fair bit of material for speculation, neh? _________________ Galadrion - Member of the Longbottom 3. |
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Kinsfire Site Owner
Joined: 01 Nov 2001 Posts: 380 Location: Roselle, NJ
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Posted: Wed Mar 17, 2004 6:05 pm Post subject: |
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I admit, a number of the quotes are direct lifts. To me, at least, it made sense that if I was not altering the section radically (and if it was a section I really liked...), then I wanted to leave the dialogue alone. Gimli was always my favorite character from LOTR, so his comments tend to undergo the least alteration.
As for magic lessening when pregnant - one thought comes to mind concerning that. Remember how they can tend to tell with a child, considering that odd things tend to happen around them (such as Harry freeing the snake by accident)? Well, imagine a woman with all those hormonal changes happening to her, when mood swings can get interesting, to say the least. The possibility is there that the magic temporarily goes away to protect the mother.
Of course, you could be reading too much into the nausea. Remember, Draco was knocked unconscious such that it gave him a concussion. I seriously doubt that Hermione went quietly - she was also knocked out. I haven't described any of her injuries yet (you know she had to take some) - what if she took a lighter blow to the head, or a not terribly gentle blow to the stomach? Also, she was being carried by an Orc, probably over his shoulder, and I really doubt that he was running gently for her sake. I handle roller coasters pretty well, and I'd probably barf all over his shirt myself after taking injuries.
Just doing my part to throw some doubt back into the mixture... _________________ That which does not kill me probably hurt like a sonuvabitch. |
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Kinsfire Site Owner
Joined: 01 Nov 2001 Posts: 380 Location: Roselle, NJ
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Posted: Mon Mar 22, 2004 1:04 pm Post subject: |
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This is simply to note that Chapter 20 is up.
Enjoy! _________________ That which does not kill me probably hurt like a sonuvabitch. |
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Kinsfire Site Owner
Joined: 01 Nov 2001 Posts: 380 Location: Roselle, NJ
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Posted: Wed Mar 24, 2004 12:39 pm Post subject: |
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Okay folks - a bit of info:
Chapters 18 and 20 have undergone some editing. Twenty lost an entire scene, and eighteen had some stuff added. That's what happens when I post my alpha copies as soon as I've done a basic spellcheck. _________________ That which does not kill me probably hurt like a sonuvabitch. |
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Kinsfire Site Owner
Joined: 01 Nov 2001 Posts: 380 Location: Roselle, NJ
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Posted: Sun Mar 28, 2004 11:19 pm Post subject: |
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Chapter 21 is up. _________________ That which does not kill me probably hurt like a sonuvabitch. |
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Kinsfire Site Owner
Joined: 01 Nov 2001 Posts: 380 Location: Roselle, NJ
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Posted: Sun Apr 18, 2004 1:28 am Post subject: |
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If you're interested, Chapter 22 is up. _________________ That which does not kill me probably hurt like a sonuvabitch. |
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Kinsfire Site Owner
Joined: 01 Nov 2001 Posts: 380 Location: Roselle, NJ
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Posted: Sun May 16, 2004 7:52 pm Post subject: |
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This forum is dead recently. Kinda sad when I was the last one to post, and that it was to note that Chapter 22 was up.
In response to this, I ask that if you're interested in the Harry Potter stuff I'm writing, please go over to http://groups.yahoo.com/group/HP_Kinsfire/ I'll post all further notices about the stories I'm writing in the HP universe there.
BTW - That will start with Chapter 24, since I just posted Chapter 23 last night. _________________ That which does not kill me probably hurt like a sonuvabitch. |
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Galadrion Registered User
Joined: 17 Aug 2001 Posts: 378 Location: Portland, Oregon
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Posted: Thu Jun 23, 2005 1:16 pm Post subject: |
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Sadly, that will no longer be happening - Yahoo! has performed their usual dirty disservice and deleted the group. (Yes, Kinsfire, I know you're aware of this. But there are no doubt people here who would also like to know.)
Also, at this time, Kinsfire.net is currently experiencing technical difficulties and is unreachable - I understand that problem is being worked on. Hopefully, it won't take too long. In the mean time, 12 Grimmauld Place is back among the currently live sites, so that's a possibility.
Thank you for your patience, and please, wave those chickens faster! We need the help... _________________ Galadrion - Member of the Longbottom 3. |
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Styx Site Owner
Joined: 25 Dec 2002 Posts: 3176 Location: West Covina, California
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Posted: Thu Jun 23, 2005 2:03 pm Post subject: |
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WTF! I wish Yahell would explain their malfunction. _________________ "Political Correctness is tyranny with manners." Charlton Heston
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