Planetfurry BBS

[DarkWolf]

Update
The version of this story that I had posted before I'd thought up a few months ago, but everytime I sat down to work on it, I couldn't seem to do anything with it. So, I scrapped it.

This incarnation that I am posting now has been swimming round in my head for a couple of years. I actually wrote the beginning of the next chapter about two years ago, and I came up with this little intro last night.

Lemme explain a little. The world that the story is set in is sort of a Sonic the Hedgehog/Mobian/Exterminatus Now kinda world. I got this idea shortly after a marathon of watching all three seasons of the Spawn animated series.

As I've stated before the title may change (if I can come up with a new one.)

Anyway, enjoy ad let me know what you think.

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Chapter 000 - The Reaper's Message

EXT. – Haven City – The Rooftops – Night
High on the roof of a tall office building overlooking the bustling Metropolis of Haven City sits a lone figure. He is illuminated by the moon and the many artificial lights lining the rooftop’s perimeter. He is a hedgehog; male, silver-furred, long, white-haired, clothed in black with a heavy black duster, and armed with a double-bladed scythe; black-handled with a shorter blade several inches beneath the longer one. He gazes around at the life that scurries around beneath him with an expressionless gaze. He is the Reaper.

REAPER:
Look at them. They have no idea that their immortal souls are about to be damned to eternal pain and agony, or blessed with eternal paradise. It’s all so…

He pauses as he spies, what looks like, a possibly fatal car accident. He smiles.

REAPER:
…exciting.

Suddenly, there is a gust of wind and a flutter of large wings. He turns as a beautiful female angel lands several feet in front of him. She is a fox; light blue and white fur, shoulder-length white hair, and clothed in white robes, and gold sandals. She is the guardian angel, Seraphim, and she advances towards the Reaper with determination in her stride.

SERAPHIM:
Why have you summoned me here, Soulless One?

He smiles and shivers at the name.

REAPER:
Ooooh, I love that one. I have asked you here to give you some very important information; information that could determine the fate of all of their souls.

He motions to the city below. She stops, glares at him, and folds her arms just below her breasts.

SERAPHIM:
I’m listening.

REAPER:
Several hours ago, a prophecy was given to both the angels and the demons. Contained within this prophecy was mention of a medical company, one that specializes in chemicals. It was also revealed that through testing of one particular chemical, a regeneration serum that is designed to completely reconstruct limbs, organs, and the very cells that comprise them, that they would create a warrior. He would be a warrior so powerful that he could determine the fate of every person on Mobius. Depending on which side gets to him first, of course.

She lets out a frustrated sigh.

SERAPHIM:
Yes, I know. All of the angels know. You brought me all the way down here to tell me this? I knew this was a waste of time.

She turns and starts to walk off. He turns back to watching the car wreck that happened below moments earlier, which is now swarming with police, firefighters, and EMTS tending to a very badly injured mother and her young son. He looks over his shoulder at her with a sly smile on his face.

REAPER:
I know where he will appear and when. And, so do the demons.

She turns back around interested and walks toward him.

SERAPHIM:
Where? When?

He points is scythe down towards the city and shoots a beam of green light into an alley several hundred feet from where they are.

REAPER:
There, in approximately three hours.

SERAPHIM:
How do you know this?

REAPER:
I have my ways.

SERAPHIM:
I thought you were neutral in this war.

REAPER:
I am.

SERAPHIM:
But, there has to be some reason for you to give this information to me if the demons already know. Won’t that cause even more confrontation and bloodshed on both sides?

REAPER:
Yes.

SERAPHIM:
Then what is your reason for doing this?

He smiles and straightens his first and second fingers as he folds his other two inward towards his palm. He points his fingers towards the sky in a quick, sharp motion causing the ghost-like souls of the mother and child involved in the car wreck below to float up to him. Once they meet his gaze, he snaps his fingers causing them to go rigid and he reaches inside his jacket. He pulls out a small obsidian hourglass partially filled with black sand, opens it sucking the souls into the hourglass, replaces the lid, and puts it back into his jacket. He then, turns to her with a sly smile on his face.

REAPER:
It’s more fun this way.
[/b]

[Syrius]

Moar plz.

[DarkWolf]

[Syrius]

There's not enough said in the story yet, and that makes me want to kno more about it. Fire away, it's too early to make any judgements.

[Virmir]

Same opinion as Syrius, as there's not enough for me to really form an opinion yet. Nothing bad about what you have so far, though, and it's rather well written.

I will say I generally don't like stories that put anthropomorphic characters into worlds that are identical to our own, in which they act pretty much like normal humans all the time. I like to see animalistic traits and behaviors in anthro characters. This is just a personal preference through, and it's too early to tell which direction you're going.

[DarkWolf]

Updated. Hope you enjoy the new version.