Planetfurry BBS

[Elfen_Furry]

Unlike a couple of years ago where I had a ddeath of a friend or family member at a rate of 1 every 6 weeks, have I ever had a rotten time in my life.

2006 has started to be worst.

Within the first couple of weeks of January, the uncle of a former girlfriend dies, and we (meaning her fmaily and I) had to deal with it.

Last Thursday Night (2/16), the mother of the one who I refer as my ex-from-heaven dies at the hospital she was staying in. To me it is sudden, though she has been in and out of the hospital for the past year. But sudden because the doctor spoken to the family saying that she was doing well and after a couple more test to be done, could be home by Monday (2/20). Her wake/funeral will be on Monday-Wednesday.

Least to say, the family is broken up by it and my ex-from-heaven, who like me, has been taking care of the mother for the past several years. I can not say how her son is doing... for I do not know. She has been there for me in my wretched past, I can do no better than being there for her.

Coming up is my uncle. His choice is a death on death decision. Like me, he has a tumor, simillar to mine but at the center of his abdomenial region. It has grown undetected for who knows how long, even he has not complained of pain or discomfort. His options are- 75% removal of his stomache and intestines, and perhaps not survive the operation or few weeks to months left of living. Several mistakes on the medical end- his operation has been delayed by weeks. Surviving with one's stomache and intestines, I know is not possible without major complications. All cases I known ended in death within a year's time. The family is not doing well by this- though they do not know what I know. Me- since my was discovered early, its being dealt with the low-dose chemo theary that I am experiementing with and so far- I can say is thumbs up.

Its going to be a trying next couple of weeks/months here, but I got to try.

-Elfen

[D.F. Thompson]

I know what you are going through. Our condolences our thoughts and prayers are with you.

[Rabbit]

Hang in there, bro.

[Elfen_Furry]

Not too long ago, at the earlier funeral, a friend of mind said to me that , "...you can not devorse life from death." He works for EMS (Emergency Medical Services) and has been going through some hard times with his family (mother is sick, in and out of hospitals and father has his 3rd stroke, and he is their caregiver).

Having been a lifeguard since 14, and done those other things in my life- plus a "few days in hell- my time spent in the early days of 9/11 doing volunteer rescue work", has harden me. My ex was fine until the end of the funeral today, when she broke down and cried...

We've been a lot together- even separated. Thats why she's my ex-from-heaven, for she is the only one who still does care about me, and I do about her. And we are still there for each other when called upon. We never really broke up, just life got in the way and separated us.

Death is part of life. I have had people die on my on my life guard duty, due to frak* ups by other guards doing a bad rescue. Its not an easy thing to go through. But birth is also part of life. Its a trinity- 1 of 3, for without any one of them, there would not be any of the other two. Death is also part of birth- to go to the next level of existance. In a way for this reason I feel sorry for Athesists.

One can argue that the ring of consciousness in our brains is the fire of the soul. But being a pattern of energy, Einstein proved that matter and engery can not be destroyed, only converted to another form (matter to matter like ice to water, engery to energy like light to heat, matter to engery like an atomic bomb or hygrogen in a star, or energy to matter like heavy atoms in a supernova). So when we die, where does this engery goes? Religiously speaking- it being the soul, goes onto the next level of consciousness, or Heaven (or hell if you were really really bad...), for we are that engery and our bodies merely a shell to house it. To an Athesist- this engery is supposed to just simply disapate into the randoness of the universe and die out, like the body did.

To convince her, my ex- that her mother is in a better place, well, no convincing was needed. Being brought up right with a healthy balance of science and religion, she knows. Convincing her of the emotional outbreak was not necessary, for her mom is now in a better place... that was the hard part. Dont misunderstand- the argement is for the former and not the latter part of the statememt. I know that when it is my turn to leave this plane of existance and have my body dropped in a box and buried for some archeologist to find a few hundred years from now- there better be a celebration. A celebration of either of my life or of my death- I know some will be doing the latter.

I'll get to see more of her as the week and month progresses. Lets see how it turns out in the end for her. As for my personal problems- they take a back seat to her.

-Elfen

[Elfen_Furry]

Its like 2002-2003 all over again...
Though my uncle had his operation, he's going to be in the hospital for quite a long while.

But on the other side of things, a father of a friend died on 3/2. He's been in the hospital for quite a while. So things are still depressing thus far, funeral plans are still pending.