Planetfurry BBS Forum Index Planetfurry BBS
Forums for Planetfurry Site Members and more
 
 FAQFAQ   SearchSearch   MemberlistMemberlist   UsergroupsUsergroups   DonateDonate   RegisterRegister 
 ProfileProfile   Log in to check your private messagesLog in to check your private messages   Log inLog in 

Jumping to Conclusions
Goto page Previous  1, 2, 3  Next
 
Post new topic   Reply to topic    Planetfurry BBS Forum Index -> styx
View previous topic :: View next topic  
Author Message
Styx
Site Owner
Site Owner


Joined: 25 Dec 2002
Posts: 3176
Location: West Covina, California

PostPosted: Fri Mar 04, 2005 4:34 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Last but not least Chapter five is up and you'll notice it's about double in length enjoy.
_________________
"Political Correctness is tyranny with manners." Charlton Heston

Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail Visit poster's website
anthony
Site Owner
Site Owner


Joined: 12 Nov 2001
Posts: 1304
Location: Norway

PostPosted: Fri Mar 04, 2005 6:22 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Enjoyed....

Smile

_________________
"My name's Lion, Anthony Lion"
A fur with a license to purr...
---
Like my Avatar?
Why not surf over to www.micecomics.com and tell Mary what a stellar job she did...
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website
Tigermark
Site Owner
Site Owner


Joined: 18 Apr 2003
Posts: 855
Location: Hopkinsville, KY

PostPosted: Sun Mar 06, 2005 3:15 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Okay, now it's done. great story Styx. I'll echo Aramis and say I really liked your character developement in this. especially Claire and Cindy, but also Cindy's parents, and Claire's. Zig and Wanda were well done, too. And having a go at Clarence's mom? Shame on you, ya ol' cat ya,LOL. Had a lot of fun reading this one, Styx.

Tigermark.

_________________
Tiger, tiger, burning bright...
http://www.planetfurry.com/~tigermark
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website AIM Address Yahoo Messenger
Styx
Site Owner
Site Owner


Joined: 25 Dec 2002
Posts: 3176
Location: West Covina, California

PostPosted: Sun Mar 06, 2005 2:16 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Heh thanks guys, I had actually thought about following up on this with a story about my character and Sharon getting together but it probably won't happen at least not for a long time. I do have an idea for a series placed in the Sabrinaverse with mostly original charaters based on a comic book style super hero.
_________________
"Political Correctness is tyranny with manners." Charlton Heston

Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail Visit poster's website
Aramis Dagaz
Registered User


Joined: 02 Dec 2003
Posts: 174
Location: the City of Roses

PostPosted: Sun Mar 20, 2005 4:27 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Oi, oh so late in replying (blame Spring Break and midterms for that). On to the OA...

Like TM said, I love the character development in this story. I think I might've read some sort of hint regarding Clarence's dad somewhere else, but this tale really brings it to life. I feel that I know the Skunk family much better after reading this story.

Points for improvement: I think this chapter has enough material for two, maybe three chapters. Breaking the chapter up a little into smaller segments would help avoid the feeling that every plot thread is ended too neatly. Don't rush it, letting a subplot linger just a little enhances the impact on the reader. You were dealing with enough story material to last probably another three chapters.

However, to say that I didn't enjoy the last chapter would a flat-out lie. I was laughing about half the time at all the dialogue. I also discovered the reason why this story was written <winks and nudges Styx in the ribs> At least you had me fooled that this story was about Clarence and not about Styx and Sharon hooking up; great surprise ending there <laughs>

Great work with this tale, Styx. This story was a very enjoyable read. Keep up the good work and let me know when your next tale is ready!

_________________
Companions the creator seeks, not corpses, not herds and believers. Fellow creators the creator seeks--those who write new values on new tablets.
--Friedrich Nietzsche
Enter the City of Roses...
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail Visit poster's website Yahoo Messenger
Styx
Site Owner
Site Owner


Joined: 25 Dec 2002
Posts: 3176
Location: West Covina, California

PostPosted: Sun Mar 20, 2005 5:33 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Very Happy Glad you liked it AD. To tell the truth I had first thought to break up the last chapter into two chapters, but ultimately I thought that once the main plot interest namely Clarence's condition was resolved interest in reading further chapters would drop like a stone, so I felt compelled to wrap everything up with that chapter (yeah I know weak but as this is only the second story I've written I'm still not real confident in my ability). As to the ulterior motive for the story, yes I have thought of writing a story with my character & Sharon getting together, but I have no experience in romance I'm not sure it will happen. I am considering another story with my character set in the Sabrinavers as a comicbook style superhero, whatta ya think?
_________________
"Political Correctness is tyranny with manners." Charlton Heston

Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail Visit poster's website
Aramis Dagaz
Registered User


Joined: 02 Dec 2003
Posts: 174
Location: the City of Roses

PostPosted: Sat Mar 26, 2005 3:41 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ah, plenty to respond to here.
Styx wrote:
To tell the truth I had first thought to break up the last chapter into two chapters, but ultimately I thought that once the main plot interest namely Clarence's condition was resolved interest in reading further chapters would drop like a stone, so I felt compelled to wrap everything up with that chapter

Are you sure about that? Give the readers a good enough hook and you can get them to read almost anything. To be honest, with a title like "Jumping to Conclusions", part of me felt that Clarence's condition wouldn't be the end of it. Like I said, there was plenty of material that could keep the story going for another few chapters. Another option would have been to end the Clarence-oriented part of the story as like a seperate part or book, and leave enough hanging for a sequel, providing a springboard for your next story. This would be good for you as the writer because you've closed the principle plot as one story, so that anything not resolved would be a new story entirely. Readers will give you a break then (well, most readers from what I've observed in others) so you can rest and plan your next story. The best example in this case would be "Identity Crisis" by Hikaru. The story really "ended" when Act III ended. Anything after that was a new story entirely. I expected him to take a month off to rest from all that writing, but he surprised me by jumping right back into it almost immediately. But at any rate, he finished almost all of the plot threads at the end of Act III, but not all, like what happened in Sheila's home plane. This was the hook and springboard for the next part of the story.

Styx wrote:
yeah I know weak but as this is only the second story I've written I'm still not real confident in my ability

No crime there. We'll be sure to help you cultivate your talent with whips and cattle prods Twisted Evil

Seriously, though. The only way to get better is to write more stories (hint, hint Very Happy).

Styx wrote:
As to the ulterior motive for the story, yes I have thought of writing a story with my character & Sharon getting together, but I have no experience in romance I'm not sure it will happen.

Didn't stop me. When I started writing furry fiction a few years ago, I had very, very little romantic experience, and most of it wasn't good enough to be considered a good influence for romantic writing. All I had to go on what what I read in other romantic stories such as Sabrina-Online the Story and Zig Zag the Story. They say write what you know, but when it comes to what you don't know, look it up. This means both actual research for technical or historic data as well as looking at what other writers wrote about similar things. My motto as a writer is "Walking through the gardens of others, I've accumulated enough dirt on my boots to fertilize my own". That's what gave me my start.

Styx wrote:
I am considering another story with my character set in the Sabrinavers as a comicbook style superhero, whatta ya think?

I'll be honest, it sounds like a fun idea, but I'm just a little skeptical about the idea, mostly because I'm not sure what it would be about (I don't read a lot of superhero comics). Don't let this discourage you, though. Write it! Show me that there is a good tale to tell! I'm sure it will be fun for you to write as it would be for others to read. Go fur it!

<looks at the size of the post> Geeze, ya'd think I was an old paw at this stuff...

_________________
Companions the creator seeks, not corpses, not herds and believers. Fellow creators the creator seeks--those who write new values on new tablets.
--Friedrich Nietzsche
Enter the City of Roses...
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail Visit poster's website Yahoo Messenger
Styx
Site Owner
Site Owner


Joined: 25 Dec 2002
Posts: 3176
Location: West Covina, California

PostPosted: Sun Mar 27, 2005 1:57 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Some things to think about, I may very well write another story with Sharon but right now my muse seems to have taken leave at least she hasn't been as insistent. A few few things pop into my head an idea or two but nothing to get me fired up, we'll see.
_________________
"Political Correctness is tyranny with manners." Charlton Heston

Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail Visit poster's website
Aramis Dagaz
Registered User


Joined: 02 Dec 2003
Posts: 174
Location: the City of Roses

PostPosted: Sun Mar 27, 2005 4:56 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Muses are fickle entities. I've had to romance a few ideas out of my muse before (as in walking to the nearest Subway and having a quiet meal, but the walk gives me time to think. Sometimes I end up with inspiration for things other than story ideas, but it's still fun). For some reason, my muse works best when I should be doing something else. What a slacker Razz
_________________
Companions the creator seeks, not corpses, not herds and believers. Fellow creators the creator seeks--those who write new values on new tablets.
--Friedrich Nietzsche
Enter the City of Roses...
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail Visit poster's website Yahoo Messenger
Cateagle
Site Owner
Site Owner


Joined: 20 Nov 2000
Posts: 1004
Location: Ft. Worth, TX

PostPosted: Mon Mar 28, 2005 1:48 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

*chuckle* And some times your muse decides to give you something for later in the story rather than for the part you're working on now. I'm dealing with some of that at the moment. Actually, several different segments of From The Wings. And some are drastically reshaping others; muses can be wicked at times. Wink
_________________
"But the wildest of all the wild animals was the Cateagle. He walked by himself and all places were alike to him."
-- With apologies to Rudyard Kipling
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail Visit poster's website AIM Address Yahoo Messenger MSN Messenger
Shadu
Registered User


Joined: 21 May 2003
Posts: 336
Location: Barranquilla

PostPosted: Thu Sep 21, 2006 4:43 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

since i think the sam about both i'l leave it here and know i mean it for both. they are very cool stories. i read them when they first came out and i can't beleive i never said anything.
_________________
__________________
New Dog In Town!
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail
Teric
Registered User


Joined: 11 Dec 2006
Posts: 2566
Location: Southern California

PostPosted: Fri Jan 19, 2007 5:13 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Just read this story for the first time. Nice work, Styx. You've done quite a bit of good character development, and Clarence finally gets to come out of his shell and be assertive.

I'm a bit suprised that Susan reacted by mauling Clarence. She has a fiery temper at times, to be sure, and heaven knows I would be spouting flames if my sister was raped. However, I must admit that I'm surprised Susan reacted so strongly and so quickly. (I realize that it was central to the story's plot, so I'll leave it at that.)

It was really cool to get a look into Clarence's past and family matters, and to meet his father.

_________________
Styx: "Oh sure like flaming a dragon going to do massive damage, brave challenge there Teric."
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
AmigaDragon
Registered User


Joined: 05 Dec 2004
Posts: 840
Location: Far Northern Minnesota

PostPosted: Fri Jan 19, 2007 5:33 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Just remember as you hop from one story to another that they aren't all canon to the others.
_________________
"Cogito, ergo es. I think, therefore you is." Ray D. Tutto (King of the Moon) to Baron Munschaussen
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website AIM Address Yahoo Messenger MSN Messenger
Teric
Registered User


Joined: 11 Dec 2006
Posts: 2566
Location: Southern California

PostPosted: Fri Jan 19, 2007 6:20 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Yeah, I realize that Amiga. But it's still fun to read the fan fics and see other fur's takes on the events in the story.

On the other hand, I need to be careful to keep cannon and fan-fic separate in mind.

_________________
Styx: "Oh sure like flaming a dragon going to do massive damage, brave challenge there Teric."
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Styx
Site Owner
Site Owner


Joined: 25 Dec 2002
Posts: 3176
Location: West Covina, California

PostPosted: Fri Jan 19, 2007 7:49 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Glad you liked it Teric When I show it to Chris he said he could see Susan reacting just that way if it were a fur she didn't know. My premis was that other then Cindy or possibly Sabrina the Clique din't really know Clarence well at all, just a self concious geek they teased Sabrina about until Cindy started dating him but there was never much interaction with Debbie or Susan. I know you like ZZtS too so if you would check out my other fanfic "A Two Way Street" James and Zig face trusng eachother with their demons, tell me what you think.
_________________
"Political Correctness is tyranny with manners." Charlton Heston

Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail Visit poster's website
Display posts from previous:   
Post new topic   Reply to topic    Planetfurry BBS Forum Index -> styx All times are GMT - 4 Hours
Goto page Previous  1, 2, 3  Next
Page 2 of 3

 
Jump to:  
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum
You cannot attach files in this forum
You cannot download files in this forum


Powered by phpBB © 2001, 2005 phpBB Group