Planetfurry BBS

[Freya]

Er, hi.
I'm a relative newbie, at least to this part of the sight. Been mustering up the courage to post here. This was a poem partly inspired by a play I saw last night (RENT) & partly inspire by my recent (incredibly messy) breakup. Please tell me what you think. Thanks, F

Missing Her

It really is
rather funny, in
a pathetic way.
I seeheartaste something
that reminds me of
her and I am brought back
to before.
Before she lied, before
she stabbed me in
the back.
The taste of mints,
a song, or even
just a short girl with
curly hair
and I remember her
and am filled with a
longing for before.
If I see someone who
looks remotely like her,
my heart starts to beat.
But is it from fear or
love?
I do not know.

***

Please tell me what you think....
It was a bit last minute, but it was boiling in my brain all night. You can be as blunt as you want.
Thank you!!`

[Shadu]

not much into poetry but i like it. i dunno the best word i think for it is, 'nice' b'cause its got like a nice-ness to it i guess, i don't really know how else to say it.

[Freya]

Thank you very much for the review.

[Asalis]

It portrays the eomtions well. you did well. I'm not mutch on poems either though. Still you did pretty good. Wish I could elaborate better but discriptive words don't come as easily to me. Because of this it takes me a long while to write a story. Still your poem is very good Freya.

[Freya]

::blushes::
Thank you.
I, er, have other ones as well, if you would like to seem them.

[Elfen_Furry]

Excellent, though I have told you that before, it is now that I am able to post it here...