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Karou WindStalker Registered User
Joined: 17 Nov 2006 Posts: 631 Location: Highland lakes, NJ, USA
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Posted: Sun Sep 20, 2009 12:05 am Post subject: |
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Good Chapter.
^_^ _________________ Independent Business Owner ... Ask me, if interested in learning more.
Everything in its Own Season <- Current Story! |
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Alexi Registered User
Joined: 08 Feb 2009 Posts: 426 Location: Virginia Beach
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Posted: Sun Sep 20, 2009 1:28 am Post subject: |
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Thank you. I was proud of how this chapter turned out. The end got to me a little. I watched it play out like nine times. Each different in some way. This is the one I liked best. _________________ "Liven a dream, Oh you're on top. My mind is aching, oh it won't stop. That's how it happens, living life by the drop."- Life by the drop. Stevie ray Vaughan. |
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Wolfshead Registered User
Joined: 25 Jun 2009 Posts: 49 Location: St. louis, MO USA
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Posted: Sun Sep 20, 2009 8:04 pm Post subject: |
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Yet another excellent chapter. The foreshadowing hints at some very interesting plots ahead. |
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Alexi Registered User
Joined: 08 Feb 2009 Posts: 426 Location: Virginia Beach
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Posted: Sun Sep 20, 2009 11:04 pm Post subject: |
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Not that I know of Mike. I am unaware of exactly how many of my fellow furs are over here but, as it is a healthy sized FOB, I wouldn't be suprised. Let them know to E-mail me and we can see if we can meet up. _________________ "Liven a dream, Oh you're on top. My mind is aching, oh it won't stop. That's how it happens, living life by the drop."- Life by the drop. Stevie ray Vaughan. |
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Teric Registered User
Joined: 11 Dec 2006 Posts: 2566 Location: Southern California
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Posted: Mon Sep 21, 2009 4:34 pm Post subject: |
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Enter Candice, a mouse with a highly troubled past, wearing an emotional mask that is all but crumbling. She's barely hanging on to emotional stability, and it begs the reader to ask "why".
Here's my guess: Candice used to (and still does??) love Frank, but is now scared to death of him because he hurt her somehow (hence the scar). She wants him, wants to be with him, and at the same time is deathly afraid that he's going to hurt her again. No wonder she's an emotional wreck.
Meanwhile, Frank nearly loses control when surrounded by the normal noise and confusion that is found in a large group of children. I shudder to think, but I suspect that his past military service involved a... mistake? One that resulted in the deaths of innocent children? If this is the case, then I truly admire Frank's strength and ability to move forward. In his shoes, I would have crumbled long ago. _________________ Styx: "Oh sure like flaming a dragon going to do massive damage, brave challenge there Teric." |
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Alexi Registered User
Joined: 08 Feb 2009 Posts: 426 Location: Virginia Beach
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Posted: Mon Sep 21, 2009 4:36 pm Post subject: |
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You ever have one of those days when the muse really hits you and your typing away like mad.
And then discover that you missed something in your research, causing you to have to go back and edit like a mad man?
Partially through Chapter seven, I was enlightened to the fact there really IS a synagogue in Bristol Tennesee.
I have since obtained the only picture on the internet of said building and done a quick review of the location (Strangely, I have driven past it a few times and never knew.)
Now I have to go back and write like a loony to get this all sounding right again.
Guh! _________________ "Liven a dream, Oh you're on top. My mind is aching, oh it won't stop. That's how it happens, living life by the drop."- Life by the drop. Stevie ray Vaughan. |
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Alexi Registered User
Joined: 08 Feb 2009 Posts: 426 Location: Virginia Beach
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Posted: Mon Sep 21, 2009 4:54 pm Post subject: |
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Teric wrote: | Enter Candice, a mouse with a highly troubled past, wearing an emotional mask that is all but crumbling. She's barely hanging on to emotional stability, and it begs the reader to ask "why".
Here's my guess: Candice used to (and still does??) love Frank, but is now scared to death of him because he hurt her somehow (hence the scar). She wants him, wants to be with him, and at the same time is deathly afraid that he's going to hurt her again. No wonder she's an emotional wreck.
Meanwhile, Frank nearly loses control when surrounded by the normal noise and confusion that is found in a large group of children. I shudder to think, but I suspect that his past military service involved a... mistake? One that resulted in the deaths of innocent children? If this is the case, then I truly admire Frank's strength and ability to move forward. In his shoes, I would have crumbled long ago. |
Wow, in depth guessing. I like that. Speculations like this make me feel like I've really conected with my readers hearts and minds.
The more I write and the more I see what's going on and how they conect, I realize that I made Frank a lot stronger than I could ever be. I find a new found respect for all of my brothers and sisters who have gone through the horrors of combat and for the struggles they have afterwords. _________________ "Liven a dream, Oh you're on top. My mind is aching, oh it won't stop. That's how it happens, living life by the drop."- Life by the drop. Stevie ray Vaughan. |
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Concolor Registered User
Joined: 19 Nov 2001 Posts: 832 Location: South Carolina
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Posted: Tue Sep 22, 2009 12:18 pm Post subject: |
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My musings followed Teric's almost to the syllable. Here is one more Heart that needs Healing.
Yes, Alexi, you ARE really connecting with your readers. With this one, anyway. _________________ Oddly enough, my life is based on a true story. (Ashleigh Brilliant) |
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Alexi Registered User
Joined: 08 Feb 2009 Posts: 426 Location: Virginia Beach
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Posted: Tue Sep 22, 2009 1:25 pm Post subject: |
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Thanks Concolor, "Inner Strength" was an experiment writing wise. I'm glad that my actual story is rolling along like this. Now if I can just get through a slightly difficult to word scene, I'd be grooving along nicely. _________________ "Liven a dream, Oh you're on top. My mind is aching, oh it won't stop. That's how it happens, living life by the drop."- Life by the drop. Stevie ray Vaughan. |
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tobi3B Registered User
Joined: 07 Jan 2008 Posts: 645 Location: Germany Siegen
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Posted: Sat Sep 26, 2009 10:22 am Post subject: |
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Interresting Candice is angry at Frank for being a foster parent for Molly. ( If my guess is right)
That these two where once a couple is now relative clear. Maybe they split up because of Candice wanted pups and Frank didnīt. And the situation escalated into something not so nice.
Time will tell. _________________ Whether a black cat brings misfortune or not, depends on whether one is a fur or a mouse.
[br]Feed Me![br]Adopted from Valenth |
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Frazikar Registered User
Joined: 25 Jan 2008 Posts: 1181 Location: North Coast, USA
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Posted: Sat Sep 26, 2009 2:16 pm Post subject: |
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now where would you get thought, tobi3b? |
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Alexi Registered User
Joined: 08 Feb 2009 Posts: 426 Location: Virginia Beach
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Posted: Sun Sep 27, 2009 7:35 am Post subject: |
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tobi3B Mmmmmmmaybe...
could be that's she's hurt and not angry.
who knows.
Don't worry. Chapter seven tells a lot more of the story. I'm about eight pages in and still trying to come up with a chapter title. The working one's not bad and i joked with Mike about another "appropriate" one but still unsure.
Should have it to Mike this week. _________________ "Liven a dream, Oh you're on top. My mind is aching, oh it won't stop. That's how it happens, living life by the drop."- Life by the drop. Stevie ray Vaughan. |
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tobi3B Registered User
Joined: 07 Jan 2008 Posts: 645 Location: Germany Siegen
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Posted: Sun Oct 04, 2009 4:01 pm Post subject: |
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Nice written
At least Carol donīt mix her dislike of Frank with her concern for Molly to much.Privat and Work donīt mix well. _________________ Whether a black cat brings misfortune or not, depends on whether one is a fur or a mouse.
[br]Feed Me![br]Adopted from Valenth |
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anthony Site Owner
Joined: 12 Nov 2001 Posts: 1304 Location: Norway
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Posted: Sun Oct 04, 2009 4:01 pm Post subject: |
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I hope I'm not the only one to read the latest chapter...
(since no one else has commented, yet)
Anyway, now we know why there's so much animosity towards Mr. Pulaski.
No femme likes to be 'dumped' and on those reasons...
And since her previous relationship must have been abusive, that can be enough to shatter what's left of her self esteem. Which again will royally piss off her closest friend.
When he screws up he does it full scale...
_________________ "My name's Lion, Anthony Lion"
A fur with a license to purr...
---
Like my Avatar?
Why not surf over to www.micecomics.com and tell Mary what a stellar job she did... |
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Alexi Registered User
Joined: 08 Feb 2009 Posts: 426 Location: Virginia Beach
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Posted: Sun Oct 04, 2009 8:14 pm Post subject: |
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Yeah, nothings halfway with Frank. But, as time goes on, one has to ask, was his action justified?
We shall see.
BTW, as a heads up to all of my readers. Due to RL issues here with my job and location. Chapter eight will not be going to Mike this weekend. It will hopefully be to the master librarian next week but I am not sure. My schedule got knocked all to crap and back. should be straight now though. _________________ "Liven a dream, Oh you're on top. My mind is aching, oh it won't stop. That's how it happens, living life by the drop."- Life by the drop. Stevie ray Vaughan. |
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